I feel like I haven't enjoyed life throughout my entire time here on this planet. There hasn't been a moment, good, bad or otherwise, that said that I needed to enjoy where I was.
Yeah, vacations were enjoyable and moments were fleeting, but it all ended up coming to a close at some point. As the saying goes, all good things must come to an end.
I'm currently in the Outer Banks in North Carolina. I'm sitting on a deck chair, alone, feeling the crisp breeze and listening to the crashing waves just 1,000 feet away. Life is good right now.
Could it be better? Absolutely. I wish I could not worry about my student loans, be making a decent living and be ready to take on the world. None of that is happening, nor guaranteed, but man, I'm enjoying life lately. It feels good to be alive.
Life is an arduous journey. It started easy, but it took an unprecedented slant into outright absurdly difficult. While the learner's curve hasn't diminished much, life is still good. I'm in a position doing what I want to in life, being around people I want to be around, and having a clear focus of where I want to go.
That's a good thing for now. One night, while feeling uncertain, I turned to music. I turned to an inspiration. I listened to Anberlin's "Unwinding Cable Car." Essentially, the song points to enjoying the moment and where we stand right now, as opposed to worrying where we're going to go. That will work itself out.
I turned to the people who inspire me. Even ones I have only been around for mere days of my life. They have done extraordinary things to push me in the right direction and keep me going, even when it felt like it was time to quit.
There's something so fascinating about our world right now that keeps me ticking. It might be the most revolutionary change since the Industrial one. That revolution changed ethics, technology, and the widespread dissemination of information forever. What does this revolution in the last ten years sound like? Except this time, it's on a global scale, fraught with increasing demands and unsolved solutions.
Every day brings us something interesting. That's what keeps me going. What new interesting thing will need a voice? What new problem might need the people's solution? I want to be a part of that solution. I want to be that voice that breaks some sort of barrier.
I'm taking life in, and I want to make a difference. I've been told before that life doesn't need difference makers. It merely needs people who will listen and do as they are told. I don't believe that. Never will. What's the point in going through life without trying something? The reason I'm here, doing what I do, is because I had an idea.
A good friend of mine started a blog not long ago. He said never to give up dreaming, because without a dream, you're done. He had chatted with someone who said to give up on the naive notion. But he keeps going. He is a beacon of his own self truth. That truth is positive. He inspired me to continue to keep going.
The breeze continues to blow, and the waves continue to crash, but the sun has set since I started writing. My life is ahead of me, even as the day has run its course. What I do starting in just a month's time will mean a lot towards my future. Whether it's here, or it's anywhere else, I will do something. I will be something.
I will stay true to what I say I am. I am a Beacon of my own Self Truth. That truth is making a difference.
